Lesbian Texting 101

Texting other girls to distract you from the fact that your crush hasn’t texted you back yet.  You know that you do this.  You text two other girls that you know will text you back, so that you forget that your crush has yet to respond to your last text.  And you set yourself up to be pleasantly surprised that your crush finally texts you back.  Unfortunately, you also get pissed when you are so excited to have a text message but it’s not from the girl that you want it to be from!

Some rules of thumb to use:

  • Most basic interpretation is that “lol” can mean that if you were saying that text message out loud you would be saying it with a smile on your face. 
  • "lol!" is a little extra effort to express that she really does think you are funny.  The exclamation means she is actually laughing at what you are saying, or at least genuinely thinks it was funny.
  • "I am so tired lol" means she can’t say something confidently and has to find humor in expressing her current state.
  • "haha yeah" means that she is purposely texting you back to let you know that she does not want to continue the conversation. Usually a dick move because it is often preferred to just stop responding, but some lesbians don’t get the hint
  • Don’t over do it with the emoticons, it gets creepy.
  • Don’t text her at an hour that you wouldn’t call her.
  • The Two Text Rule: In the span of 24 hours, if she does not respond to your most recent text message, it is fair game to send one more to continue the conversation or ask a question.  If she does not respond to this second text, give it 24 hours before contacting her again.

And the Golden Rule of Lesbian Texting:

Make sure when you go to text a someone about someone else, you don’t accidentily text the person you wanted to gossip about… or shit will hit the fan.  Actually, don’t gossip let alone gossip in text messages, period.

Gay Girl Problem

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